Saturday, January 7, 2012

Conversation snippet #2: Songs that get you "in the mood"

The following conversation happened as Wife got home from hanging out with some friends. Kiiinda makes you wonder what they were talking about during "girl time."


Wife: I have an idea for a post on your blog...

Me: Oh really?

Wife: Yeah. I think you should do a post on what songs get people "in the mood."

Me: Uh... you realize I write a humor blog, right? Not a sex blog.

Wife: Sure. Whatever. You should do it anyway.

Me: Okay... but how can I make that funny?

Wife: It doesn't have to be funny. I just want to know. *dramatic sexual look*

Me: That "come hither" look is fake, isn't it?

Wife: Listen. Let's just say hypothetically speaking that I would want to make you a mix tape of songs that get us "in the mood." I just want to know what songs to put on such a tape.

Me: Okay, first of all, we're no longer in the 80's. Nobody makes mix tapes. They make playlists. Second, you don't want to make me a mix tape. You want to make you a mix tape so you can think lascivious thoughts while thinking about black men named Lionel Richie. Let's just be real here.


Wife: For your information the song I have been singing in my head all day that made me think of this is not by Lionel Richie. It's by Janet Jackson.

Me: Oh, is it that song that we sang at the lunch table in junior high together that made all of our friends uncomfortable...  *starts singing and Wife chimes in* "making love to you, oh it felt so good and ooooooh so riiiight..."

(Aside: we seriously did that. I was in 8th grade and Wife was in 9th grade and she was the illustrious Student Body President of Thomas Jefferson Junior High. So I was basically singing a song with royalty.)

Wife: No. It's... not that one.

Me: Wait, what other Janet Jackson song gets you "in the mood"?

Wife: *hesitates*

Me: Oh, you've gotta tell me now. I have to know this for emergencies.

Wife: *pulls it up on Youtube and presses play*



Me: Okay, so the Janet Jackson song that you would put on your playlist to get you in the mood is called "Let's Wait Awhile?"

Wife: Yes...

Me: Are you listening to these lyrics? She just said "Let's wait a while before we go too far." This song is a total junk-block.

Wife: But she also says "I promise I'll be worth the wait"...

Me: This is probably the only song Janet Jackson ever sang about abstinence. She sings some of the most graphic sexual lyrics out there, and you choose her abstinence anthem for your foreplaylist? I am so confused right now...

Wife: Mmmmm. Just listen to that sultry beat... that sexy synthesizer...*nods head*

Me:  Oh, oooooh. I see.  Are you sure this has nothing to do with that black guy wearing a turtleneck in the video that looks vaguely like Lionel Richie from the 80's?

Wife: JUST ASK THE QUESTION ON YOUR BLOG! And mention some of my other playlist songs so that people don't think I'm stupid.

Me: Yes, I'm sure mentioning your other songs will change people's perceptions entirely. What kinds of other songs are you talking about?

Wife: Like.... Radiohead's Reckoner. Or... oh man, what was that one song that that one dude sang???

Me: ...I'm beginning to see why you need others' input.

Wife: Please, Toniferous Weedles? Please just ask!

Me: Okay. I'll do it.

(I have the feeling this will be good for me in the long run.)


So, you heard the woman. What song would go on your "in the mood" playlist (aka foreplaylist)? Don't be shy. You know you have one or two. (Even you Sister Warner.)

(Now if you'll excuse me... *lights a fire, turns down lights, applies chapstick and deodorant, then blasts "Let's Wait Awhile"*)

49 comments:

  1. Ahahahaha! I cannot WAIT for Jenni to see this! I'm guessing pretty much anything by Barry White would be good for this playlist of yours. :)

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  2. Mannheim Steamroller has a CD entitled "Romance".

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  3. The guy who sings Candy Man from Willie Wonka gives me the creeps. Anything by Neil Diamond, Johnny Cash and Nat King Cole!

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  4. 1. I'm stealing "foreplaylist."

    2. Crash by The Dave Matthews Band. Really.

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  5. Sade - By Your Side does it for me, but somehow not so much for Ashlee. So she could use it to get me in the mood, by why bother when all she has to do is breathe normally and it has the same effect...

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  6. it's called "Fever for the Flava", by hot action cop. Parental advisory on those lyrics! there is an edited version that still gets the message across though.

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  7. I was always a fan of "Always" by Atlantic Starr...and there's one by Collective Soul that made it on that list. I have no idea what it's called, but every time I hear it, I'm reminded of being newlyweds.

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  8. I actually don't have one, but shortly after we got married husband went through my BritPop collection and came up with quite a few (who knew?), and the top of his list is "And the Beat Goes On". So, by association, that's the only one on my list.

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  9. This feels weirdly intimate, Weeds, but I'm gonna say "Fields of Gold" by Sting.

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    1. Yes, totally. . .the part about watching the children run through the fields. . .gets me every time

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  10. Although, "Wife," maybe don't add that one to your playlist, eh? I'd hate for you to be reminded of who likes that song at an inopportune moment.

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  11. Ooo, Tamsin, Fields of Gold is good. So is the Jazz standard In the Wee Small Hours of the Morning. I could spend way too much time thinking about this so-since I'm not going to be able to use the said "foreplay list" anytime soon - I'll keep the rest of my list private. :)

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  12. I have never thought of this but loved the comment by Konrad about all his wife has to do is breathe on him. Have you heard of Robin Thicke "Lost Without You"? Yeah def does not get me into the mood but me and my friend at college would bust out singing lines from it because it was THAT ridiculous. You should check it out.

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  13. Norah Jones is our go-to for this sort of thing (particularly Turn Me On: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mHff55AeEAQ). This one has to make your list. You know it's the perfect song to get you in the mood.

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  14. P.S. I can kind of see where Lolly is going with Let's Wait Awhile. Kind of.

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  15. Robin Thicke! Holy moley! Oh, and Musiq Soulchild. Those men are pretty potent. :D

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  16. Okay, maybe too cynical, but at 17 years and 4 kids, the "song" of a movie starting downstairs meaning we have a good 15-20 minutes before our youngest needs something.

    Non-cynical~ I will have to agree with Brandi that "Crash" is a good song.

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  17. I don't know why, but I also loved Let's Wait by JJ. Probably because I was the age of waiting at that point but it held such promise of being worth the wait. Ask wife if she agrees. CRASH by Dave Matthews Band is pretty good stuff.

    No laughing but the video Rush, Rush by Paula Abdul. I wouldn't admit this in person, but...Keanau in the video? rowr. See for yourself...but don't tell anyone, k?

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yqyIaNWP0T0

    www.alotoflayers.blogspot.com

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  18. First time poster, long time (if a year is a long time?) reader...

    I personally agree with The Onion up there. *whew*....

    Sade, yesss. And Sting. I'm older than your wife, but Robin Thicke makes me laugh. Ridiculous white- boy-tryin-to-be-black- music, complete with the talking thing in there like it's 1994 and he's with a bunch of brothas wearing matching leather outfits. *shivers*....not soulful, just silly.

    However, you know who IS awesomely soulful and sexaaaay? Maxwell. Although I'm pretty sure he'll give you Baby #4, so if you're not ready for THAT yet, hold off. (And he's even better looking than Lionel. Google him and see. In other words, you might wanna hold this in reserve for times when you need to pull out all the stops. )

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  19. Oh man, I am partial to tunes from the 80's. Some of The Cure, The Smiths, The Replacements...a little Peter Gabriel, Modern English, maybe some Phil Collins. For the ones who weren't going to high school dances during the age of big hair, flourescent clothing and Madonna, I could definitely include Crash, and many other songs by DMB. Gotta also go with Adele, The National and a little Trevor Hall to mix it up. Can you tell that I've already thought of this? Also, can I steal foreplaylist too?

    As always, great post The Weed!

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  20. O.M.G. I love this post. And songs that set a mood are my specialty - so i'm glad i saw this! check these out. guaranteed to either turn you on or crack you up!

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OyrHIWLK7tI <-- "yes boss" - hess is more

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gZo26PzXohU <-- "pregnant" - r.kelly, tyrese, and robin thicke

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xzQvGz6_fvA <-- "i'm on fire" - bruce springsteen

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UAOxCqSxRD0 <-- "wicked game" - chris isaak

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_Mzklb9nkXM <-- knocked up - kings of leon

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NtGB11VRNm0 <-- "that's whats it's made for" - usher

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vhq0RbjzzNo <-- "nasty naughty boy" - christina aguilera

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m8zksSKb9Zg <-- "come undone - duran duran

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JCBm5VbwJvY <-- "infinity" - the xx

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nrMwgTc69y4&ob=av2e <-- "everybody here wants you" - jeff buckley

    just spent alot of time getting the links to all these songs so i hope you and the wife like em :)!!

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  21. Okay, you need to tell the wife that I understand completely where she's coming from with her "Let's wait a while" song. But, we are sisters so that might have an influence here.
    But, since we have both known our husbands since before High School I think it makes us think about that certain time when we weren't able to act on those feelings and it can kind of be a turn on to think how you felt then... and know you can do something about it now. But then again, that could just be me. =)
    Not gonna lie, I have a lot of songs I could put, but one of my favorites is REALLY corny, but I love it. Spice girls, When Two become One!!

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  22. This list will give you a good idea, except for Barry White's 1974 appearance, of what songs WON'T set the mood:
    http://intothelyonsden.blogspot.com/2012/01/my-musical-travesty.html

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  23. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D1Fcaro25Ek

    I just CANNOT think of Moby when I'm listening to it, or a can't get aroused for a week.

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  24. Ha, you guys are awesome and I might be just a little bit in love with all of you. Maybe it's all of these sultry tunes... No, but seriously you guys are the best blog-readers in the universe. This list is unbelievably great and I can tell you spent a LOT of time coming up with stuff, so thank you a whole, whole lot. Wife says she's extremely grateful. And do you know what I'm going to promise to do? I want to make a page with all of your suggestions so that we can help the world be more successfully intimate. The therapist in me is so proud... TOGETHER WE HAVE MADE A DIFFERENCE. (Also, if anyone is stumbling onto this post days or even weeks or months hence feel free to submit something and I'll put it on the Foreplaylist page.)

    Thanks again, guys.

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  25. My now husband and I began our relationship with 2 states seperating us (Texas being one of them and in my book it is so big it might as well be 3 seperate states)
    This song helped to get me through the longing and when I hear it today it brings back those moments.
    Gavin Mikhail - Brave

    Also, in a super corn--dog confession I love Clay Aiken's The Way.

    Norah Jones, Diana Krall and Michael Buble also make Hubby and My Foreplay list.

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  26. Al Green, Lets Stay Together.... and Sade, All About Our Love.

    Also, stealing foreplaylist. ;)

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  27. Anytime, Anyplace by Janet Jackson (Oh snap! That's hot stuff!)

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  28. Okay, so I guess I should be more specific about Mr. Maxwell, then...if it's going on The Foreplay List, I don't wanna skimp.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D7rm9t5S4uE <--"Ascension (Don't Ever Wonder)" and anything else from this album, "Urban Hang Suite".

    Sade:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NYz8xs163YU
    <----- "Is It A Crime". She's perfect, though, anything she does.

    Lastly, I'm a big nerdy country fan, so this one is way romantic to me (especially the video, since they're real husband and wife and she's pregnant and all...*sigh*):
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohC7o_PPPtY
    <---- "It's Your Love", Tim McGraw and Faith Hill.

    Okay, I'm done. :)

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  29. Jamie! Just saw it! Why do I always have this cringy face on when I read anything on this blog? And yet I still keep coming back.

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  30. Love it!!! That's all I'm gonna say 'bout dat :)

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  31. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  32. How do I reply to people's comments? The reply button does not work for me.

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  33. Maquel! No linking to porn sites! Geez! Also, Weed, your sister made me come here a year ago, and I've been silently stalking every so often since. But now I'm for real following.

    Also, for my foreplaylist I'd have to go with Kiwi by Maroon 5, and Bubbly by Colbie Caillat. Actually, most things by Maroon 5. Sexy, that. Also, anything narrated by Patrick Stewart or Alan Rickman. Rickman's voice is like dark chocolate melting in your mouth.

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  34. The Mr and I were very enamoured of this song when we were first together and didn't have a toddler and limited to stealthy silent ninja-sex: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9wov67o_Ink
    I'm not sure it would do much for Wife though. Not if Janet Jackson and Lionel are her usual special-sexy-time pair.
    We also (somewhat bizarrely) used to get it on to this song: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NaHN7EHdVa4 which is odd because it's mostly (and by mostly I mean entirely) about skinning someone and then wearing the skin and posing as them, and I don't know about Mr, but I'm not Ed Gein so that doesn't turn me on. I suppose my only defence is that we were 18 and 19 and a bit pre-occupied and probably not listening to the words.

    There are others, but somehow I don't think NIN's 'Closer' is really your cup of tea...

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  35. Well, Weed, I'm gonna be honest and tell you that anything by Buckcherry starts up the old love engine at the Christison house. But I doubt that these songs would make your foreplay list, because they are NASTY! (Hence the true meaning of foreplay.)

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  36. Long time lurker here, but this post is so good I had to make my following official. I check in every Sunday while I'm eating all the primary snacks... I mean, teaching 4 year olds about Jesus. I figure this blog is like a For the Strength of Adults pamphlet, so it's all good.

    Janet Jackson is a pro at setting the mood. Her entire 'Janet' CD is awesome - That's the Way Love Goes, Anytime Anyplace, Again, and especially 'If' (which is a little tricky because it simultaneously puts me in the mood AND makes me wanna do that knees bent - arms chopping the air - sideways shuffle thing that she does in the video where it looks really cool, but if attempted by me would just kill the mood created by the song). Other songs that round out my eklectic combo of good mood tunes are "Cryin'" by Aerosmith, "Wicked Game" by Chris Isaaks, "7" by Prince, and "No Diggity" by Blackstreet. I agree with the previous post about songs from high school being a turn on now that I'm a married an adult that can capitalize on the moment and the music.

    Keep up the great work. I love the inspirational thong photo.

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  37. Oh Josh, I'm so glad I'm not the only one! I actually have a playlist in my itunes labeled "mood music." The only odd part is, I'm an unmarried BYU girl who has no need of such things...yet! Anyway, I tend to play this while working out, which become excessively awkward when you start saying the lyrics to "Bad Touch" by the Blood Hound Gang out loud in the middle of the gym. It also includes such gems as "Danger! High Voltage!" by Electric Six. If you're in the mood to watch a hilarious and awkward music video, check that one out. There's also "I've Gotta Feeling" by Black Eyed Peas, I always imagined a groom leaning over to his new bride at a wedding reception and whispering that into her ear. Then there's "every time we touch" by Cascada. "Roxann" by Queen, and it's cover from Moulin Rouge, "El Tango de Roxanne." Then there's random soundtrack pieces, like "The Kraken" by Hans Zimmer, or a collection of songs from Apocalyptica, a group that covers Metallica songs played on electric cellos. You don't know the truth of a turn on until you hear that. Of course, the latest crowning jewel of it all will be "I'm Sexy and I Know it" by LMFAO. Although, that one may have lost its power since that is what I listen to while getting ready in the morning.

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  38. This might be random if you're not into jazz, but Diana Krall's 'S'wonderful' .

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  39. Haha, just found this post. My favorite song is by Roberta Flack, The first time ever I saw your face.

    I found your blog on Facebook. I used to be in the same ward as the Warner's and Crabtree's. Both Jenni and Ashlee posted on their facebook. I decided that I needed to come and take a look. LOVE IT!

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  40. So I am curious.. where is the list.. I might have some need of it soon.

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  41. Really? No "Let's Get It On"-Marvin Gaye or "Between The Sheets"-Isley Brothers? No wonder she want's to wait awhile... :p

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  42. Sorry, I guess I'm not logged in. That was -Crystalshine Marie

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    1. Paula Cole's "Feelin' Love" enough said ;)

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  43. Yes! Totally Paula Cole's "Feelin' love" but on a bit less dirty note AzYet's "Last Night" . Plus there are five fine balck men for the wife ;)

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  44. And nobody else brought up "Cruisin'", sung by Huey ewis and Gwenyth Paltrow ?!

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  45. Every year around Valentine's Day I make a (fore)playlist that is usually more than a little bit rude. Occasionally I share it with other married couples I know, and sometimes even the general public. One of the songs that made last year's list that will make this year's list, if I remember to make a list this year, is a certain Tenacious D song. I won't repeat the name of the song in polite company... Here's a link to last year's foreplaylist: http://grooveshark.com/playlist/Sappy+Love+Songs/43628076
    This year's list will likely include Kings of Leon's Use Somebody, and one that probably can't be found online, a cover of Your Sex is On Fire, by the one and only Corey Cottrell. Otherwise I'm at a bit of a loss for this year as I haven't heard a whole lot of new music, least of all anything rude enough to pass my standards. I'll have to check out some of those links above....

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  46. Incubus' Stellar does it every time! Lol. "Take me to outer space.......how do you do it? Make me feel like I do....". Not to take Lolly's side, but Lionel Ritchie has been succesful in the past. Also, Mark Anthony is a genious!

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