This is the Third Annual The Weed Electronic
Christmas Holiday Card!!!
You'll note that it's the 31st of December. As always, this is a purely strategic move! It's to make sure you're not so saturated with Christmas cards that by the time you see this you no longer have the energy to even read it. I want you to be able to enjoy this Weed update with fresh eyes and an open heart. Because I'm a giver.
(The lateness certainly has nothing to do with the fact that I can barely pay enough attention to what's happening around me to successfully complete a round of Rummikub without messing the entire game up by putting down a non-sequenced set of numbers, let alone get a Christmas card out on time. You're so silly for thinking that has anything to do with it! Hahahahadon'tjudgeme.)
Ahem. Without further ado, let's get this
brag-fest family update started, shall we?
Tessa, age 2
Our Little Miss T had a fantastic year this year. She has learned to say words, and she has learned to walk really really good! She might walk better than most two-year-olds, but it's really hard to tell because there isn't an Olympic event for toddler walking, so we're not sure how to gauge her ability with perfect accuracy. But that's okay because she gave us something different to share with you. Tessa is now fascinated with knives! We learned about this fascination when I came into the kitchen one afternoon and she was standing on a chair by the sink holding the largest butcher knife known to man and smiling coyly at me. So as not to scare her, I calmly approached her and said "what do you have there, T?" and she grinned and handed me the hefty blade, and I sighed with relief when she neither accidentally cut off her own face, nor gouged out my good eye with her new toy. We responded to this development by placing the knives on the highest shelf in the kitchen. Because we're good parents.
As you might guess, days later we came in to see her standing on the counter holding the same knife and smiling like she'd found a great treasure. Clearly this girl has a love for knives and an uncanny ability to acquire them. It's a lot like being an Olympic gymnast. Except with knives and climbing counters and stuff.
Her greatest feat with knife procurement though was when we found her randomly running around the kitchen with a brand-new razor sharp Cutco knife. Not sure if you are familiar with these things, but they are sharp enough to cut through bone, so she was basically running around gleefully with a death-stick that could easily remove entire limbs off her sisters. We risked losing digits getting it from her. We were absolutely baffled by this and had no idea where it came from. Eventually, though, we realized that it was a gift for Lolly which we'd placed under the tree (not knowing what it was). Tessa wasn't interested in presents. She hasn't opened another one before or since--the only gift that called out to her was the knife, and she knew exactly which one it was. We're pretty sure this is a sign of genius. Because nothing says "I have a high IQ" like being able to find sharp metal wrapped in paper left on the ground by incredibly observant parents. Go Tessa!
Next, we have our little Viva le France, age 4.
Viva loves all things fashion and accessories. She also loves animals. (Sidenote: Viva has been in tears several times this year because we will not buy her a real chihuahua for her to carry around in her purse. She has recently decided that instead of a chihuahua she would like a "crinkle" dog (aka a pug). We read up on pugs and learned that they are couch potatoes who don't like to exercise and that they are social, loyal pets. Obviously, with those qualifications the pug is a perfect dog for the Weed household! Our landlords won't allow us to have pets though, so we'll have to wait to initiate Pug Weed into the family until we can buy a place of our own. For now, Felix and Alex, our parakeets, will remain the only Weed pets.) Anyway, we recently discovered that one of the main reasons Viva wants a dog is because she wants to "dress it up." We have caught her many times at her craft table fashioning dog clothes out of paper, tape, and staples. Perfect for warmth in the winter months! If you are interested in having Viva make your pet an outfit, please post your dog's picture and measurements in the comments and she will decide if your pet inspires her or not.
Anna, age 6, has found new meaning in life by expressing her deep-felt emotions through dramatic phrasing. And also crying. There are.... so many examples of this new dramatic gift that we're hard pressed to choose just a couple. Here's one: Viva was sitting at her craft table trying to make a check book cover out of paper and tape. When Lolly noticed what she was making, she remembered that there happened to be an old check book cover that belonged to her grandfather in the office. (Remember how Lolly is kind of a hoarder?) She gave it to Viva, and Viva was thrilled. When Anna came home from school and learned that Lolly had given that precious family heirloom to Viva instead of her she came running into the office in tears. "Viva gets all of the special things from our grandparents," she said to Lolly. "When it's all said and done, I will have nothing. Nothing but an empty heart!" She refrained from throwing herself to the floor as she said this, but we're not sure why.
Here's another classic: Lolly has been the first counselor in the Primary presidency (the children's organization in the Mormon church) for two years. She was recently released from that calling where she had previously been very involved with the girls, and interacted with them at church every week. We had to tell Anna ahead of time so she wouldn't create a scene at church. This ended up being a wise move. When we told her what was happening, she was immediately moved to tears. "Your time in Primary has passed away!" she gasped, cupping her head in her hands. "I thought you'd be there forever but I guess my dreams have ended. I never thought my dreams would end..." by this point she was full-on weeping. "It's too horrible to even think about!" Cue: hysterics. (Um, does it mean we're bad parents if we laughed while trying to comfort her?) Pretty much what this means is that when she's a teenager we're totally screwed.
Josh (age 32) and Lolly (age 34)
Well, what is there to say? Truth be told, Lolly and I have had a pretty unremarkable year. Just the same ol' same ol' for us! You know how it goes. Things were so commonplace--so boring and mundane--that there isn't really that much to share. I did write a couple of things, so that was nice, but other than that, things were so standard that there's not a lot worth mentioning. Well, I guess Lolly did finally clear our stainless steal appliances in the kitchen. And I switched out my old toothbrush. Go hygiene! Just livn' the dream. Ya know?
All right. Let's close this sucker out with some family photos. These are of the entire Weed clan minus my brother Chad who is on a mission in Tennessee.
Bottom row: My sister Maquel, her husband Nate Welch, Me, Lolly, Tessa Viva
Middle: My dad, Stew, my mom, Shellie, and Anna
Back row: My sister Jenni holding Parley, her husband Justin Pratt holding Alice, and my brother Chris (who is SINGLE, ladies!!!! Hit me up with an email if interested!!!)
(Photos taken by Tami Baumgartner)
(Photos taken by Tami Baumgartner)
Bonus stair shot!!!
All right, I think that pretty well wraps things up. On a serious note, I'm really, really grateful for the many wonderful things that have happened to my family in 2012. We were healthy, blessed abundantly, and richly benefited by our relationships with family and friends. Each of you reading this is a part of that for me, and I appreciate you stopping by. Genuinely. I hope you have an incredible 2013. I plan to make mine the best year of my life, and I mean that in all sincerity. I hope you do the same.
Until next year...