Tuesday, August 27, 2013

Catch up!!!!

Sometimes I look at the date I'm like "Holy mother of pearl, it's been 47 years since I posted" and then I think of all the things I could talk about and they parade through my mind like a... parade. (BEST SIMILE EVER.) But then, when I go to write crap down, it all leaks out of my brain like a... big ol' brain leak. (I WIN AT WRITING.) And then my head is empty. So, so empty. Empty like... like something that's really really empty and not full or even partially full of stuff. (SOMEBODY GET THE NOBEL LIT. PRIZE COMMITTEE ON THE PHONE ASAP)

So, instead, you get paragraphs like the above that contain parentheticals of me yelling at prize committees.

Blogging's the best!

But yeah, here I am. Blogging up a storm on this Tuesday morning. Bloggedy blog blog.

Blog.

Hmph.

*awkward silence*

So how are you? Good? Your parents all right? You enjoying the summer weather? Weather's fascinating, huh?

Cool.

*crickets*

Oh, I know what I can show you!

This is a sequence of photos that just appeared one day on Lolly's phone. Your job is to guess what it is:

Weird. 


Oh crimeny. Is that what I think it is??? 


Wait... what? 

Still not sure whether to be relieved or disturbed...

Okay. Make your guess now. The next one is the big reveal.


Oooooh! Okay. Tessa got the phone. 


And she is apparently fascinated by her own feet. Got it.

Did anybody get it?

In closing, here are five random tidbits about the last few weeks:

1. Lots of work.
2. Mousley family reunion in a big ol' mansion with a pool and tennis courts and stuff in Mapleton, UT. Refreshingly drama free, I might add, and very fun. 
3. Lots of Cafe Rio.
4. Visit to the Dunford Donut factory. Of course.
5. I can't think of a fifth thing. Which means my life is really, really boring. Also two of the previous four have to do with food. I probably need to go on more runs. 

What have you been up to this summer? Anything I (or Lolly) should make sure to do with my girls before school starts?

I love you all.

Monday, August 5, 2013

When daddy's in charge...

(Most of this post was written a couple of weekends ago.)

Well, Lolly has left me.

For the weekend. Everyone remain calm.

Every now and again Lolly does something that I think is very wise: she takes some time off from her job as The Lady We Go To When We Need Anything. She books a local hotel for not one, but two nights, and then she does this weird, totally unusual thing where she doesn't assist a single person go pee or poo, clean a mess, or fix anything to eat for over 48 hours. Crazy, I know.

So what I'm saying is that she gets in a car and drives away from her family, then she sits in a chair and eats chocolate and watches movies or WHATEVER SHE WANTS, and then she curls up in a huge, comfy bed and goes to sleep, then sleeps in the next day with no child- or husband- contact, and then spends a day pampering herself, and then when she gets tired that night, she goes to sleep again, and sleeps in the next day as long as she wants, and then she spends a second day pampering herself, meditating, and having thoughts like "Wow, so this is what it's like to not have my children barge in on me 17 times while I go pee. I remember this! It's been almost a decade, but I do remember this!" And then, after the kids are in bed the second day, she sneaks back home, and goes to sleep in her own bed refreshed and ready to tackle motherhood again.

I totally know how that feels. I get to take a break like that from my job every single weekend!

Anyway, what this means is that this weekend is "Daddy Weekend." When it's Daddy Weekend, things end up going different than usual.

Here is some photographic evidence of some of the classic moments of Daddy Weekend:

Saturday, August 3, 2013

A very interesting blog week

So, a week ago I woke up in the morning and pulled out my computer. I dashed off a quick post about a sex-talk I had had with Anna. The idea had been in my head all week and this was the first chance I had to write it down, which I did thinking it might get a chuckle or two. I had Lolly read it over and we laughed at our awesome daughter. Then Lolly remembered some pictures we got for free of Anna that would never be used elsewhere and we slapped those suckers on the post, and I pressed publish.

And then that post became my second-most-read post ever? Shared over five thousand times and counting on Facebook? #1 on the "parenting" sub-Reddit? Seen by thousands upon thousands of people? (Side-note: could somebody please explain Reddit to me? My BIL has tried several times but I still don't get that place. It kinda intimidates me.)

This is how blogging works, apparently. My most popular post was something I spent probably 20 hours on over the course of several months, and it took every ounce of my soul to find the courage to press "publish." And my second-most-popular post (which admittedly, only saw about a tenth of the traffic--if that--that the first one saw) took me 20 minutes and a quick read-through directly after rolling out of bed and taking a pee one morning.

Welcome to the Internet, people. Things are crazy here.

Then, later this week...